Love it.

I drive a Prius. A little, cute Prius that comes with with excellent gas mileage and a decent amount of self-righteousness about my middle-aged mom tree-hugger social status. It doesn’t take up much space. It’s super quiet. Its interior cloth seats and manual controls are unassuming and polite. It is the exact polar opposite of what I am driving this week and although I am a little embarrassed about how much I love this rental, I really love this rental.

Oh, hi, Tahoe. I didn't see you there. Just kidding. I saw you there. In fact, I can see you from my dining room. And probably from the neighbor's house, too.

Oh, hi, Tahoe. I didn’t see you there. Just kidding. I saw you there. In fact, I can see you from my dining room. And probably from the neighbor’s house, too.

You guys. This is like a small apartment. In fact, I am sitting in it right now, my laptop plugged in and charging and resting on a center console that is as big as my lap. I have to climb into this monstrosity.

I love it.

(Have I mentioned yet how much I love it?)

It’s also pretty tricked out, as big suburban trucks can sometimes be. It’s got an all-leather interior and power-everything. It’s like a car of the future. All power outlets and blinking lights. It vibrates when I’m about to collide into something in front of me (I could use this on every car I drive) and it has air conditioned seats. So my precious backside can stay cool in summer. Apparently this car rents for close to $200 per day and I don’t even want to think about how much gas costs. Despite really wanting to drive this across the whole country, I plan to stick pretty close to home this week. It’s my good fortune that the other rental I was driving (a modest and boring Malibu) got ticketed today while I was teaching because it had an expired inspection sticker. And that the guy working at the rental place was finishing out his last day at the company. So, when I joked that he might upgrade me for my “pain and suffering” at having to find time in my day to come exchange the car for one that wouldn’t get tickets while parked on city streets, he jokingly said, “well, I have this Tahoe…” And then I not-so-jokingly said, “I’ll take it.”

So, here I am in this boat of a vehicle, feeling slightly guilty about my emissions (although not as guilty as if I were driving a Volkswagen — jeez, VW. You kind of suck.) but also sort of loving it.

(I mentioned that I love it, right?)

The Who loves it too. "I can walk around in here!" he shouted from the waaaaaaay baaaaaaack.

The Who loves it too. “I can walk around in here!” he shouted from the waaaaaaay baaaaaaack.



There are a handful of things that result in my extreme frustration/aggravation/anger/impatience. I’m thinking that maybe, if I list the things, seeing them on paper will help me find common denominators or reasons behind them — or more likely, things in me that get triggered during these behaviors. If you have any insight to share, please please do. I’m really hoping I can figure it out and stop being so annoyed all the time. (Caveat: I know a lot of this is just typical 6-7 year old stuff, which is why I am trying to think about what is activated in me so I can work with it.)

  1. When he gets really silly. 
  2. When he touches me on my face, takes my glasses off, or repeatedly makes small movements (finger or toe wiggles, usually) against my body. 
  3. When he leaves pillows and blankets on the floor. 
  4. When he screams, “ok!” after I’ve gotten frustrated at him and told him so. 
  5. When he doesn’t eat. 
  6. When he fidgets with crumbs of food, a straw, or a cup at mealtime. 
  7. When he takes a game or a joke too far or too long past fun or funny. 
  8. When he is selfish with his friends. 
  9. When he talks nonsense or asks nonsense questions. 
  10. When he asks “why” without thinking first.