Five.

Five things that aggravate me. In no particular order.

  • Blankets, etc. left on the floor.
    Every goddamn morning, The Who leaves the down throw in a heap on the floor between the couch and the ottoman. Sometimes, there are also pillows that he has carelessly let roll off and then doesn’t pick up. Tonight, after I allowed him to watch a movie with his dinner, he left a blanket, two pillows, and a cloth napkin. It makes me want to kill him.
  • Crappy weather on my birthday.
    I know that with an early April birthday, it’s a crap shoot. My mother reports that it snowed on the day I was born and so I’m never quite surprised when it turns out cold and wet. But it has been gorgeous and sunny on April 8th enough times to tease me and make me a believer. Tomorrow the forecast is 47°, windy, and rainy. F that.
  • “It’s not fair!”
    You know what, kid? Life’s not fair. Suck it the hell up. You’re 6. Turn off the TV. Put your dishes in the sink. Pick up your socks. No, we’re not walking to school today because we’re not going directly to school. No, you can’t have Tootsie Rolls for dinner. No, you don’t get any presents for Easter; you’re a Jew. Shit’s not fair, dude. Move on and quit whining.
  • All. The. Things.
    I happen to be married to someone who gets stressed out by clutter. And our house is small. And we have many things. I have neither the time nor the energy to tidy up every day and yet, there are always things to put away. Frankly, it all makes me feel crazy, too. I can’t stand the piles of things that accumulate over the course of the week on the edge of the dining room table and the collection of worn clothes (and who knows what else) on my bedroom floor gets on my own nerves, too. I want it all put away neatly, but I don’t want to be the one to do it.
  • Email.
    There’s too damn much of it. There’s enough coming from people I know and organizations I want to hear from that I don’t need to also sift through the enormous amount of crap that comes down the pike every day. Hundreds of emails a week are filtered out through my junk mail setting and still there are hundreds more sitting in my inbox. I need, perhaps, a better filing system — a place to put emails I don’t want to delete, but don’t need to be looking at. And then shit mysteriously disappears, too. Emails I know I wouldn’t move or delete suddenly no longer exist. There’s no good alternative; it’s a necessary evil. But still.
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